How To Talk To Women Without Overthinking!
Men are from Mars, women are from Venus. At least this is what we have been told.
There was a book written with that title awhile back and to me, it served to create the illusion that men and women are polar opposites in terms of species and have little hope of ever really understanding each other.
How to Talk to Women
What this author did not realize is that men as individuals are very different from each other. You cannot start an argument with “Men are all ……” and not look ignorant, because all men aren’t anything.
The same is true with women. Not all women are alike. What makes each person wonderful is that they are individuals. They each have their own loves and hates, hopes and dreams.
I know this looks hopeless. If all women are different individuals with different tastes and ideas, how in the name of all things Holy can you learn to talk to each and every one of them? Fear not! What I am about to share with you is a secret. It is the secret of how to talk to anyone no matter who they are and to build interest and ultimately love with them.
1. Look past the façade and see the real person beneath it.
Underneath the clothing of skin and bones, we are perfect people. We have crappy baggage and things in our past that haunt us but these things are not us and we know that.
Tim McGraw, Faith Hill - Speak to a Girl
No one likes to be reminded of the bad parts of themselves or their painful past. What we are most proud of is who we are innately. We are most proud of the perfect person underneath. When you talk to a woman (or a man or a child) look for the perfect person and talk to him or her.
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In some people it is easier to see this perfect person than in others, and in some it is so hidden by strange pseudo personalities and other weird baggage that it is almost absent. If the person you are talking to makes it too hard to access that perfect person underneath, move on. Find someone who doesn’t have as much baggage. And whatever you do, don’t waste your time talking to pseudo personalities. They just aren’t worth it.
2. Take the time to build common ground and understanding.
Practice this skill. Go to the supermarket or somewhere where you will have to interact with people. When you get to the check out, find something you like about the checkout person.
I find that women love jewelry and take time and effort to choose and wear pieces that look nice. If you find a piece of jewelry on them and you comment favorably to them about it, you will be met with the person looking up and seeing you and not some nameless, faceless person. They will automatically start feeling a little better about you.
3. Let the person talk about herself.
This is the easy part. You don’t have to be dazzling or brilliant. All you have to be is a good listener and respond with things that are pertinent to the subject at hand. It really is a piece of cake.
For example, you have just commented favorably on a piece of jewelry (or a sweater or scarf) and the conversation has started. Generally they will tell you a little bit about the piece. “Oh, my mom bought it for me for my birthday!’ You then smile and say “What a great mom you have!” or something that you know she will agree with.
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Resist with all your might the impulse to start talking about yourself. This conversation is all about her. If you keep this up each time you go through the checkout line, you will find that soon you are friends. From there an invitation for coffee is a perfect next step to get to know each other better.
4. Avoid subjects on which you do not agree.
There is no quicker way to make someone hate your guts than to take an opposing viewpoint to theirs and then try to convince them that they are wrong. Let’s say your adorable check out person has accepted your invite for coffee! Yay! This is a big step. Don’t blow it now by trying to impress her with how smart, big, or strong you are, and how dumb, weak, and misguided she is. If you do this, this will be your last date and you will have no one to blame but yourself. Instead find things that you agree on.
If you disagree on politics, avoid that subject like a five day old burrito stub that you have just dug up from under the sofa because your negative comments on the subject will be just about as welcome. Stick to the things you wholeheartedly agree on and you will be fine.
5. Don’t violate her personal space.
Your adorable clerk is a woman. She has had her share of guys trying to cosy up to her and get close. Respect her by giving her space. Trying to move in too close when she is not ready for that is a violation of her limits. To her this may mean that if you violate limits now, who knows what limits will be violated when she allows you into her world?
6. Get your personal hygiene handled!
Brush your teeth and comb your hair. Don’t stink at all! I know I shouldn’t have to say this but sometimes people don’t know they stink. Make sure you don’t! If you just had coffee and a cigarette, chew some gum or something!
Check your teeth and make sure you don’t have anything stuck in them. Don’t look all rumpled unless it is sexy rumpled. Pay a little attention to your wardrobe. Look clean and don’t wear old threadbare clothes. No one will respect you if you don’t respect yourself and your outward appearance is an indicator of your respect level for yourself.
Don’t worry if you are a little overweigh or feel you are too short or have any other personal attribute that bothers you. Most people don’t even notice these things. If they do and do not want to talk to you because of them, they are not worth it anyway. Move on! There are many wonderful ladies out there who are looking for a caring and nice person like you.
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7. What about gifts?
Most people love gifts but there are times when gifts are unwelcome. Let’s say you and your beautiful clerk are now having dinner together this evening. It is perfectly appropriate to give her flowers but don’t give her flowers, chocolate in a heart shaped box and a new car.
She does not want to be put under an obligation and too many gifts make her feel that she now has to do something for you. While this may sound great, it feels awful. Have you ever shown up at work and forgotten that it was pot luck day and you brought nothing? How did you feel? Did you go around telling everyone that you forgot it was pot luck day and then ate only chips? Did you sneak out the back and give the whole thing a miss because the obligation was just too much? Do you see what I mean?
If you want to impress her, wash and clean your car. Ask her what kind of movie she likes or what she likes to eat and make reservations at a restaurant you know she will love. Take time to create an evening that she will find magical. What will impress her is the care you took and the respect you had for her to take that time.
8. Choose wisely!
Remember! Not all women are desirable just because they are women or because they are pretty. A pretty snake can still kill you and a woman who is negative, antagonistic, or passive aggressive (also referred to as covertly hostile) will make your life, and the life of any children you may have, miserable.
Think ahead before getting serious. If you find that your future girlfriend is one of these types, give her a hearty “So long, farewell, auf wiedershen and don’t let the screen door hit you in the ass on the way out!”
A warm and loving woman with a twinkle in her eye and a sense of humor is far more desirable than a pretty psycho. Beauty can fade over time when it is only on the surface. Real beauty that you see when you see the perfect person underneath is forever. Life is a tough game and only someone who has integrity, compassion and commitment will be there for you when you really need her.
The others, if they are self centered or psycho will be long gone the minute you need a friend the most.
How to Talk to Women
9. Recognize when she is not interested and move on.
Let’s face it, even though you are wonderful, dazzling and brilliant, you may not be someone’s cup of cherries or bowl of tea as far as future boyfriend material is concerned. It happens. If it is clear that she does not want a relationship, then ok. You are not wrong and neither is she. Perhaps you can be friends. One can never have too many nice people in one’s life.
There you have it! The important information on how to talk to anyone. Now go forth young Jedi warrior and use your power for good. I expect an invite to your wedding or at least send me a slice of the wedding cake!
How do you talk to a girl you are interested in?
You see her across the room, but you can't get up the gumption to say anything because you just don't know how to talk to a girl you like.
Don't feel ashamed. That's a problem plenty of guys struggle with. Not knowing how to talk to girls is one of the main reasons it can be so hard to figure out how to get a girlfriend.
While it may not feel like it when you see another opportunity pass you by, it's actually fairly easy to get past this problem.
If you just follow the right steps, you'll be able to solve how to talk to a girl you like, and what's more, you'll figure out how to make her want to talk to you too.
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Contents
7 Steps- icon anchor link
7 Steps
Over Text- icon anchor link
Over Text
At Parties- icon anchor link
At Parties
More Steps- icon anchor link
More Steps
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Why Is Knowing Exactly How To Talk To A Girl You Like So Important?
Why is Knowing Exactly How To Talk To A Girl You Like So Important
via: Unsplash / Chris Moore
No matter how you look at it, you won't be able to get very far with your romantic goals if you can't figure out how to talk to the girl that you like.
On some level, talking is still the most important skill you can have when it comes to moving to that next step with a girl. You can have all kinds of style or skill or a great car, but if you can't talk, you'll never get beyond smiles and potential.
Once you learn to talk to girls you like, though, and really talk to them, a whole world of opportunities can open up.
Talking is really how you get from A to B with a girl, from seeing her to getting her number, or from saying hi to getting a date.
THIS Is How To Talk To Girls And Spark Attraction (This is how a woman wants you to talk to her)
Luckily for you, you can move on to B finally by just following the steps below.
How To Talk To A Girl You Like: 7 Steps
How To Talk To A Girl You Like 7 Steps
via: Pexels / Toa Heftiba Şinca
When it comes to solving the problem of figuring out how to talk to the girl you like, it really is just a process of steps.
If you work your way through these 7 steps, one at a time, you'll do more than just figure out how to talk to the girl you like, you'll move your chances of something serious significantly farther along, and you'll have had a nice conversation as well.
Here are 7 steps on how to talk to a girl you like:
1. Approach The Girl You Like
How To Talk To A Girl You Like-Step 1 Approach The Girl You Like
via: Unsplash / Joshua Rawson-Harris
This step is perhaps a bit obvious. After all, you can't talk if you don't approach the girl. But for many, figuring out how to approach a girl is as difficult as figuring out how to talk to her.
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The key to this is timing and confidence (or faked confidence). Wait for a moment when she looks like she isn't engaged in anything too serious, and then try to approach as calmly and self-assuredly as possible.
To look more confident, don't avoid eye contact and make straight for her.
2. Start A Conversation With A Girl You Like
How To Talk To A Girl You Like-Step 2 Start A Conversation With A Girl You Like
via: Unsplash / Wiktor Karkocha
Now that you're standing next to her, you've got to actually figure out what to say. Don't get nervous. Knowing how to start a conversation with a girl is really just a matter of figuring out the right thing to say in the moment.
To help, use some conversation starters. These can be as basic as discussing a shared class or the event you're at. Or, try to ask her a unique question.
Mantelligence has a long list of conversation starter options for you to use.
3. Know How To Respond To A Girl You Like
How To Talk To A Girl You Like-Step 3 Know How to Respond to A Girl You Like.jpegvia: Unsplash / Milan Popovic
While this is more of an instinctive step, it's an important one to mention. Use all your conversation skills to work with the conversation she gives you.
Listen to what she's saying, ask questions, and try to respond thoughtfully. The better you respond to her conversation, the more she'll feel pulled into the conversation.
4. Know What To Say Next To A Girl You Like
How To Talk To A Girl You Like-Step 4 Know What To Say Next To A Girl You Like
via: Depositphotos / Tirachard
So, you've used your conversation starter, you've responded to her polite responses...now what?
Now, you need to know what to say to a girl after you've gotten past the introductions. You need things to talk about with a girl that go beyond a quick question.
Basically, you need something to say that communicates your interest. To do that, just choose one of the options below.
Option 1: Compliment Her
You probably already know that compliments for girls can get you pretty far, but you may not yet know how to compliment a girl.
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The best way to go about this is to keep it simple and start casual and genuine. If you share a class, compliment her on an answer she gave. If she's wearing a nice outfit, tell her.
Don't try to go too hot and heavy or too intimate in this conversation. Save that for after you get closer.
Option 2: Say Sweet Things To A Girl You Like
Similar to Option 1 but still distinct, one of the best things to say to a girl you like is just something sweet. There are plenty of sweet things to say to a girl that come off well no matter how well you know her (or don't).
Try telling her that you're glad she's feeling better if she was recently ill, or ask if she needs any help with her homework if you've heard she's struggling with a class.
Or, just tell her you've been really wanting to talk to her for a while and it's nice to finally chat.
5. Keep The Conversation Going With A Girl You Like
How To Talk To A Girl You Like-Step 5 Keep The Conversation Going With A Girl You Like
via: Unsplash / Alexis Brown
After you've given a compliment or said something sweet (or if you aren't comfortable being so direct at this point), then it's time to figure out how to keep a conversation going with a girl.
The best method for this is usually to redirect the conversation to the general and build back to those more focused comments.
Talk about the event you're at or mutual friends. Gossip a bit if she seems inclined. Use your surroundings and shared experiences to build the conversation around.
Keep it general but keep it interesting, and most importantly, just keep it going for a while.
6. Ask Questions To Ask A Girl You Like
How To Talk To A Girl You Like-Step 6 Ask Questions To Ask a Girl You Like.jpegvia: Unsplash / Manuel Meurisse
At this point, you've used a good conversation starter, given a compliment, and had a bit of chit-chat. Now you want to dig a little deeper into her. It's time to ask questions.
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While questions can be employed for any step, you should make a point of specifically having questions to ask a girl at this point.
With questions to ask a girl you like, make sure they stay on point and within bounds. Basically, ask her anything, but don't get too intimate in this conversation.
Ask her opinion about things she shows interest in, from TV shows to sports teams. Ask her for advice on how to solve a problem so she can show off a bit. Ask her about her preferences for nights out.
7. Don't Walk Away Without Being Sure You'll Talk Again Soon
How To Talk To A Girl You Like-Step 7 Don't Walk Away Without Being Sure You'll Talk Again Soon
via: Pexels / Caio Resende
Once you've asked your questions, congratulations, you've succeeded at solving how to talk to the girl you like. All that's left is to make sure you leave the conversation with a way to continue it later.
That can be as simple as telling her you'd like to chat again soon, or as bold as getting her number or even asking her out.
Whatever you choose, make sure it's clear to her that you don't want this to be a one-off.
How To Talk To A Girl You Like Over Text: 3 Steps
How To Talk To A Girl You Like Over Text
via: Unsplash / Thom Holmes
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If you've already gotten her number, you're doing pretty well for yourself, but you may be sweating how to text a girl you like.
As with just learning how to talk to the girl you like or how to text a girl in the first place, it's all a matter of following the steps.
Here are 3 powerful steps on how to talk to a girl you like over text:
1. Start A Text Conversation With A Girl You Like
Step 1 Start a Text Conversation With a Girl You Like
via: Pexels / Bruce Mars
You used them above, so use them here. With some text conversation starters, you never have to worry about how to start a text conversation with a girl.
Just drop an interesting comment or a great question, and you'll have a way of avoiding needing a good excuse to write her in the first place.
With this, you can go simple by asking about her favorite movies, or more amusing by asking if she'd rather bubble gum taste like fish or fish like bubble gum. Or, just send her a meme you think she'll laugh at.
Just give her something to think over or to laugh at, and she'll be happy to respond.
2. Know What To Text A Girl You Like
Step 2 Know What To Text Next A Girl You Like.jpegvia: Pexels / Andrea Piacquadio
Once you have her with a conversation starter, let the conversation naturally. If there's a slow-down, try these options when you aren't sure what to text a girl next.
Option 1: Ask Questions To Ask A Girl Over Text
If you aren't sure where to go next, try some questions to ask a girl over text. Questions, once again, are always the best option.
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You can ask her about your mutual friends or classes. Or, ask her something a little deeper, like where she would be in ten years if money was no object. Or, keep it a little lighter by asking about her spirit animal.
Option 2: Send A Good Morning Text For Her
If it's early enough in the morning, use this as a fall back for your conversation. A good morning text for her will make her feel special and let her know how much you think of her.
Just drop in that you were excited to talk to her first thing or ask her if she slept well. You can also move on and start talking about dreams, both future and bedtime variety.
Option 3: Send A Good Night Text For Her
On the opposite end, make her message a good night text for her.
You can wish her sweet dreams and ask her to contact you tomorrow. Or, turn it into a conversation about the things that always make her stay up all night.
Option 4: Send Flirty Texts For Her
A final option when you aren't sure what to text after your conversation starter is to be bold and jump in there with some flirty texts for her.
Tell her she looked great and then ask her if she noticed just how good you were looking too. Ask her about her deepest secrets and then ask if any involve you.
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Keep it fun and silly, but you can use texts to really show your feelings.
3. Transition From Text To Person
Step 3 Transition from Text to Person
via: Pexels / vjapratama
Just like with the in-person situation above. When your text conversation is done, build towards the next conversation or meeting.
Set up a conversation at school or work, or at least tell her you'll text again tomorrow.
How To Talk To A Girl You Like At Parties
How To Talk To A Girl You Like At Parties
via: Pexels / Bruce Mars
When you want to know how to talk to a girl you like, the ideal situation is you catch her alone. However, in a party situation, that isn't always possible.
Then, you need to figure out how to talk to girls at parties, which luckily, isn't that different from talking to a girl you like in general.
The main difference here is that you've got to make a point of incorporating others into the conversation.
If you have a friend to approach with you, that makes this easier, since they can handle most of the side conversation with her friends. If not, be polite and friendly, but just focus your attention on her and use the steps above.
More Steps On How To Talk To A Girl You Like
There's more to picking up a girlfriend than just knowing how to talk to a girl you like. You also need all of these skills:
Learn how to text a girl when you get to that next step and want to keep going.
Impress a girl at a first meeting or on a first date by showing her you know how to flirt with a girl.
Find out how to ask a girl out so you're that much closer to girlfriend territory.
In Conclusion
Perhaps the first major step to learning how to get a girlfriend is learning how to talk to a girl you like. If you can talk, you can get closer and build towards something more serious.
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For some guys, that big conversation can be terrifying, but if you just follow the steps above, you'll know how to talk to girls in no time.
Knowing how to talk to women might just be the single most important skill a man can learn.
Not every man is born with the gift of the gab. It takes practice to know how to approach a woman, and engage her in stimulating conversation.
In this article, I'm giving you my surefire conversation tips to help you navigate that all-important first conversation!
In this article, I'll explain how to:
Compliment her
Tell a joke
Find common ground
Notice the details
Invoke pop culture
Ask about her favorite show/movies
Ask about her passions
Avoid mansplaining
Don't talk about your ex
Pay Attention To Her
Ask to be introduced
Never fear the mundane
Scan the room
Approach her from the right direction
Use the right conversation angle
#1 Compliment Her!
man talks to women giving a compliment
So, how to talk to women? Well starting off a date with a great compliment immediately makes you seem kind, attentive and considerate. It can lead to a great conversation and set up a whole evening for success.
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You might be tempted to start a conversation by complimenting a woman’s physical appearance (“You have such beautiful eyes,” “I love your smile,”). A more effective approach is complimenting something related to her personality.
If she’s a colleague who just gave a great presentation in a meeting, compliment her on her confidence and public speaking skills. If she’s carrying a book you’ve read before, compliment her on her taste in literature.
Take things one step further by praising personal qualities instead of acquired talents. In other words, complimenting a woman’s skill at networking shows your appreciation for her business acumen. Tell a woman you admire her intrinsic kindness though and you show your appreciation for who she is as a person.
#2 Tell A Joke
man telling a joke knows how to talk to women
This might be the easiest way to break the ice. According to Dawn Maslar, author of Men Chase, Women Choose: The Neuroscience of Meeting, Dating, Losing Your Mind, and Finding True Love, laughter “releases oxytocin, the ‘bonding hormone.’” A goofy pick-up line or a cheesy joke can be a great way to create a comfortable, lighthearted atmosphere for the rest of the conversation.
Landing a joke at the beginning of a conversation lets your date know right from the get-go that you have a great sense of humor. If you establish yourself as a funny guy at the onset of a conversation, you have a much higher chance of seeming attractive to your conversational partner!
Just steer clear of jokes that are overtly political, vulgar or crass. Those kinds of jokes might go over well with your friends, but they’re not the greatest way to make a good first impression on a stranger or casual acquaintance.
#3 Find Common Ground
man finding common ground knows how to talk to women
A really easy strategy for knowing how to talk to women is using what you have in common as a springboard. One of the simplest ways to do this is to use the setting of the conversation to your advantage.
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Behavioral investigator and Science of People founder Vanessa Van Edwards notes that this tip “can be modified to any kind of event.” For example, if you’re approaching a beautiful woman at a party, you could ask her, “How do you know the host?” That way, you can establish that you both have at least one person in common, and the conversation can progress from there.
If you’re at a work event, Van Edwards recommends tweaking the question to “How long have you been a part of this organization?” No matter what situation you’re in, beginning with the settings or people you have in common can help create a solid foundation for the rest of the conversation.
#4 Notice Details
man knows how to talk to women by noticing details
You'd compliment a well-dressed man on his stylish accessories so why not do the same for a woman?
A woman’s clothing can be a great jumping-off point for a conversation. If she’s wearing a shirt or hat with a sports logo, you can ask her if she’s a fan of that team.
The same applies for clothing with movie and TV references or unique accessories like eccentric jewelry, shoes, or a quirky purse. Asking about those accessories can also be a great way to break the ice.
Complimenting a cool or quirky outfit shows you’re attentive in a sophisticated and attentive way, not creepy or lecherous.
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#5 Invoke Pop Culture
man and woman watching tv
If you feel you have no confidence to talk to a girl then bringing up current pop culture is an easy way to kick things off. Comment or joke about something she’s probably familiar with.
Recent streaming service shows, pop music and reality TV shenanigans are all safe bets. Just remember to keep it lighthearted — avoid politics, and don't bring up a pop culture event you feel negatively about.
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If you hated the most recent season of Game of Thrones then don't bring it up until you know your date a little better. Starting things off a conversation on a sour note will cast a negative shadow over the rest of your conversation.
Just think, it would be super awkward if you say you hated a movie or show and find out she actually loved it.
#6 Ask About Her Favorite Movie or TV Show
This conversation starter is tangentially related to the pop culture tip, but it’s more specific. Practically everyone loves movies or has a favorite Netflix series.
When it comes to talking to women, start by sharing your personal favorite and then ask her about hers. “Lately I have been addicted to Money Heist – do you have a favorite Netflix series?” A woman’s favorite movie or series says a lot about her. It can hint at whether or not you two have compatible interests.
If you two end up arranging to see a movie or binge-watch a series on a second or third date, you’ll already have an idea of what shows she might like!
#7 Ask About Her Passions
knowing a woman's passion is how to talk to women
The idea of carrying a conversation all by yourself probably feels intimidating if you're shy or introverted. An easy, subtle way to shift the focus of the conversation to your partner is to ask her what she’s passionate about.
You don't have to straight-up ask her “What are your passions?” Try asking her what she likes to do in her free time instead.
Start off by sharing something you like to do, and then ask her to pipe in. For example: “You know, I’ve been trying to learn Spanish lately. A friend of mine showed me a really cool app called Duolingo, it’s way more fun than 8th grade Spanish! What do you like to do in your free time?”
Knowing their talents and interests also gives you a great opportunity to compliment a woman without mentioning their appearance. It's a classy move and immediately separates you from other men.
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#8 Avoid Mansplaining
What woman doesn't love a whip-smart man? Talking to a woman knowledgeably and articulately makes you very attractive in a first conversation.
There's a critical caveat though — acting too knowledgeable can be a turnoff. You may have heard of the term ‘mansplaining'. It essentially describes a situation where a man grossly underestimates a woman’s intelligence by explaining things she clearly already knows.
The solution? Career and personal coach Marty Nemko, Ph.D. says you can “mitigate the risk of seeming hubristic by keeping your comments brief and perhaps by softening the impact, for example, by ending with, ‘Just a thought. What do you think?”
Doing this gives your date or partner the opportunity to share her expertise and offer her opinions. You're not making her feel steamrolled by your knowledge.
#9 Don't Talk About Your Ex
a man talking about his does not know how to talk to women
A man who rants about his ex does not know how to talk to women.
Especially if you’re on a first date, bringing up past relationships is an instant conversation killer. It sounds obvious but you’d be surprised how easy it is to accidentally mention exes.
Remember that your date isn't your psychiatrist. Don't unload your emotional baggage on her.
When you bring up your most recent ex, no matter what your motive, your date is going to decide you’re more interested in your ex than her.
How to talk to women? Even if your last relationship ended on a sour note, try to focus on the potential for a new and happier relationship. Don't give in to the temptation to dig up old beef.
#10 Pay Attention
Sending the first message to a woman you've met online can feel incredibly daunting – even if you’ve matched with each other. Even after you shoot your best shot, the woman can often leave you hanging and never bother to reply.
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Increase your chances of starting a real conversation by taking the time to check out her photos and bio. See if you share a similar hobby, taste in music or favorite hangout spot.
Be more attractive to women by showing you're attentive and observant. It's as easy as starting a conversation using something you saw on her profile. It tells her you’re not sending the same message to every single woman you match with.
#11 Ask To Be Introduced
man being introduced knows how to talk to women
If you see an interesting woman at a mutual friend’s party, ask your mutual friend to tell you a few things about her then ask your friend to introduce the two of you.
Use the tidbits of information you get beforehand to start a natural conversation: “So I hear you like skiing, what’s your favorite resort?” or “You’re a Florida State grad? Did you ever get tired of all the sunshine?”
#12 Don't Be Afraid Of The Mundane
Make talking to a woman much easier by leveraging your immediate surroundings. It's something you both have in common.
Bringing up seemingly mundane topics like a band or special drinks menu is a good conversation starter with a girl.
When talking to women, say something positive followed by a question like:
“This is such a cool wine bar, have you been here before?”
“Any recommendations?”
“I remember when this was just a parking lot, they really turned it around, I love the atmosphere!”
“Have you tried any of their appetizers? I’m having a tough time deciding, they all look so good!”
#13 Scan The Room
Before you even talk with a woman, you want to watch how she enters the room.
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Does she come in and go straight to your table or does she pause and look around? What is going unsaid is she's either giving you 100% of her focus or she's looking over other men.
Use this to get a sense of where she sees your relationship. If she is not giving you 100% of her attention, take things slow but make sure she knows you are interested in her.
#14 Approach Her From The Right Direction
If you take anything from this article it should be to never approach a woman from behind. This can be scary and is the worst thing you can do when approaching.
The best way to approach a woman is actually from the side or the front. If you approach from the front though, move to her side afterward. Standing directly in front comes off as aggressive. Talking to her from an angle is going to be your best bet.
#15 Use The Right Conversation Angle
Imagine you’re talking to a woman at an angle. She’s leaning over, she’s speaking with you. Focus on having a normal conversation. While you're talking, the goal of the conversation should be to have her start facing you – for her to choose to actually have that face-to-face interaction and create romantic chemistry.
Ask yourself where her feet are pointed. If her torso is facing you but her feet are pointed in a different direction, it could be that she wants to get out of here. Pay attention to this and give her the opportunity if need be to leave.
BONUS TIP: Talk To Women Intimately
man and woman talking intimately
A seemingly innocent work conversation but well within each other's personal space.
Let me end this by talking about intimate space and touching. What is normal personal space? Imagine stretching your arms out. This is your personal, intimate space. My wife and kids are allowed to enter this space and I’m usually expecting a hug when they get this close to me.
So, if you enter a woman's intimate space and she doesn’t reciprocate by touching you – or if she backs up – that's a bad sign. She's signaling you’ve moved too quickly and you need to (maybe literally!) step back, respect her boundaries.
Now how to talk to women and the size of intimate spaces changes from culture to culture. Many people in Hong Kong think it’s okay to talk closely to each other. If you're in central US where I’m from though, people give each other plenty of space.
HERE'S WHY TALKING TO WOMEN IS HARD FOR YOU - If You Can't Talk To Women... Do THIS!
What about touching? A woman touching your elbow, back, shoulders, all of these are great indicators.
We all feel much closer to people that we have actually touched. This is why I advocate guys wearing textured clothes like cashmere sweaters and tweed sports jackets. People naturally want to reach out and touch it!
How To Talk To Women – Summary
Knowing how to talk to women can seem tough. You might be afraid of rejection or coming off the wrong way. Talking to women isn't rocket science though.
It comes down to confidence and practice. Remember, the worse she can do is say no.
How do you start a conversation with a woman?
Having a conversation with a cute girl you like can give you the jitters. You want to impress her by projecting the best version of you, but you are confused about how you should go about it. It’s natural to feel the pressure while approaching or messaging her.
Thoughts such as, “How do I start the conversation?” or “What if I say something wrong?” could run through your mind, making you nervous and conscious. To impress her, you need to be equipped with some right techniques and confidence. In this post, we tell you some simple ways to start a conversation with a girl—in person, over a text, and online.
How To Talk To Woman
Tips To Start A Face-To-Face Conversation With A Girl
Starting a face-to-face conversation with a girl can sometimes be intimidating. Knowing what to say will help you relax. Here are some ways to make a great impression.
1. Compliment her
Women love being complimented. Be sincere and courteous in your compliments and draw the line. Salacious or strong remarks might backfire.
Compliment her smile or her eyes and tell her she is beautiful. You can talk about her attire and be respectful. Say something, such as “The dress looks amazing on you” or “That’s a lovely dress!” Keep it short, impactful, and genuine, and do not go overboard. The idea is to make a good impression. Too many compliments might make you come across as creepy, needy, or insincere.
2. Greet her
You don’t always have to use a corny pick-up line to approach a girl you like. Sometimes, a simple ‘Hi” goes a long way. Put on your best smile and greet her warmly with a simple “Hello.” Work on your body language and be open, relaxed, and confident.
Do not forget to make eye contact and be attentive while greeting. Maintain a respectable distance and do not intrude on her personal space. Observe her reaction while deciding your next approach. If she seems uninterested, step back.
3. Introduce yourself to her
When you meet someone new, it is good to tell them about yourself and get them interested. Start the conversation by telling her your name, and if she looks at you with interest you can continue to say something about your profession or interests. Sharing why you approached her might intrigue her too.
You can use a funny anecdote to make your introduction livelier. Keep it short and sweet. If you talk too much about yourself, she will probably feel you are too self-absorbed. While talking about yourself, notice her body language. If she smiles or appears to listen intently, then the conversation is probably going well but be sure to ask her questions as a follow-up.
4. Refer to a common thing that connects
Starting a conversation by talking about something common between the two of you helps establish an instant connection. If you are at a party, you could say, “It’s a nice party, right?” or “Do you know the host?” and take it from there based on the response. If you have met through mutual friends, you can ask her how she knows that mutual friend. While initiating conversation, be casual but show interest.
How To Talk to Women With CONFIDENCE 💪
5. Use a pick-up line
A pick-up line can be a great way to break the ice. Pick-up lines can be corny, but you will score a brownie point if they make her smile or laugh. Body language, delivery, and the content of the line matter. If your posture is relaxed, your eyes twinkle with amusement, and the delivery is confident, you can make a great impression. As for the content, consider the setting, the mood, and your intention.
You could try something subtle, such as, “My friends think angels are a myth. Can you please meet them and prove them wrong?” or a romantic pick-up line, such as, “I thought my day couldn’t get any better, but then I saw you and realized I may have just met the woman of my dreams.”
6. Ask her about her interests
Asking someone about their likes and interests can help you build a rapport and keep the conversation flowing. You can be indirect if you don’t want to seem too forward. If you see her enjoying a song in the club, you could say, “I love this song!” “Do you like it too?” If she replies affirmatively, you can follow this up with the question, “Did you listen to the new single by this singer? It’s groovy too!”
You can use the direct approach as well. It’s good to stick to neutral topics in the beginning. Refrain from asking personal questions. Ask her about the movie she recently enjoyed, the TV show she binges on, and the type of food she likes. When she starts talking, pay attention and repeat some of what you hear. Girls like guys who are good listeners.
7. Enquire about her day
Asking her about her day can be a good conversation starter. Be gentle and kind when you pose the question. You could ask, “Hey, how was your day?” If she gives a one-word answer, prompt her further by asking, “What did you do today?”
Let her know you genuinely want to know her. Your politeness may prompt her to open up. If she seems unhappy with her day, cheer her up by telling her a funny or embarrassing thing about your day.
This Will Make A Woman Think About You NONSTOP!
8. Request for her guidance
Asking her for a suggestion or help can be a good way to break the ice if you are nervous about approaching her directly. If you work at the same office, you may ask for her guidance in a particular project. In college, you could approach her for notes or ask for study tips. If you meet at a party, start by asking her for directions or feedback on the food or drink.
Tips To Start A Conversation With A Girl On Text
Right techniques can help you have long text conversations with the girl you like, even if you are shy or reticent. Here are some easy ways to initiate a talk.
9. Send her a sweet good morning text
Sending her a sweet good morning text is a great way to occupy her thoughts. You could text a short and impactful message like, “Hey, was thinking about you so thought to check in with you. Have a great day!” or compliment her by saying, “Talking to you makes my morning coffee more refreshing and sweeter. Good morning!” Send the message and wait for her reply. Don’t bombard her with texts if she doesn’t reply.
10. Share a flirty message
Sending a flirty text could work well if you have known her for quite some time. Some light-hearted flirting can be a mood uplifter and adds spice to any conversation. If she flirts back, you can even ask her out for a cup of coffee! You could say, “Every time I think about you, a smile lights up my face.”
You can also playfully tease her a little by saying, “You were in my dream last night. Did you miss me that much?” or “I adore everything about your beautiful laughter, even the cute little snort you make.” End the text with a smiley face to reinforce the fact that you are just teasing.
11. Talk about a future event
It is a simple way to start the conversation with a girl who has recently shared her number with you. It would be an ice breaker, and you wouldn’t come across as creepy or desperate. You can start with a question or a statement. If a mutual friend’s party is coming up, you could ask, “Hey are you coming for the party tonight?” or you could say, “Hope to see you at the party tonight.”
If you are in college and a test is coming up, you can start the conversation by saying, “All set for the test tomorrow? I am super anxious about it.” You can also start the conversation by talking about an upcoming holiday, for example, “Hey, it is Christmas next week. I am very excited. What are your plans?”
12. Share something that she enjoys
A relatable meme or a cute photo is a great way to lift someone’s spirits and get the conversation flowing. If it’s a funny meme, you can share it with a message, “Hilarious, isn’t it?” If it is a video that you think she would find adorable, text her, “This made me think of you” with a smiley face.
She may appreciate you for lifting her spirits and making her laugh. But be careful not to load her phone with too many messages, or she might start ignoring them.
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13. Request recommendations
Asking her opinion is not only a fantastic conversation starter but also sends a message that you value her opinions. It is also a great way to know her views and choices. You can ask for her recommendations about various things. For example, you can text, “Hey, thinking about watching a new show/movie, any suggestions?”
If you are a foodie, it would be a great idea to know her food preferences. You can bring up the topic by texting, “Was planning to eat out today; any restaurant recommendations?” If she loves food too, she would happily recommend several places. In case the conversation continues positively, you can even ask her to join you.
14. Ask stimulating questions
Posing interesting open-ended questions can help you know each other well and keep the conversation alive. Questions such as, “What is the weirdest thing you have done?” would result in tons of stories exchanged back and forth. Hypothetical questions, such as, “If you were given one superpower for a day, which one would you choose and what would you do?” can also keep things interesting.
You can also go for this-or-that questions. For example, “Pizza or pasta?” “Friends or The Office?” “Mountains or beach?” You can cover a wide range of topics with this and uncover plenty of things about one another. Avoid yes or no questions as they can end a conversation quickly.
15. Share random but interesting stuff
Sometimes, random but exciting things can change the mood, leading to a great conversation. Choose facts that suit the time, occasion, or her personality. You can add a question related to the fact. For instance, if it is time for her coffee, you could send her this: “Did you know coffee helps you live longer? How many cups do you have in a day?”
You can state a fun fact about music. For example, “Did you know that the kind of music you listen to impacts the way you perceive the world? What are you currently listening to?” And, the conversation can go on.
16. Create suspense
Texts that create mystery can be a great way to intrigue her, and she may reply faster. The key to such texts is the amount of information shared. You can go for texts such as, “Hey, today, the most amazing thing happened.”
Using the topic of her interest and creating suspense would make her excited. For instance, text her saying, “Hey, I was watching “Stranger Things” as per your recommendation, and I have a crazy theory. I can’t wait to share it with you.” If you go to the same college, you can use that reference to create a mystery. For example, “You wouldn’t believe what Professor Jones did in class today.” The right amount of mystery can entice her into a conversation.
Tips To Start A Conversation With A Girl Online
Girls could be cautious while having an online conversation because of the unpleasant experiences they usually face. With the right approach, you can please her and let her guard down. Here are some ways to start an online conversation with the girl you like.
7 Signs She Wants You To Talk To Her! Exactly When To Approach Girls & How To Talk To Women
17. Be quirky
Showing your sense of humor and quirkiness can get you noticed faster and make a great impression. Send a quirky message with a question or try to keep the message unique and light. Avoid anything offensive, and do not go overboard with the humor.
You can say, “Hey, fellow Game of Thrones fan, I think Lord Baelish is smarter than Lord Tyrion. What is your opinion?” If she is wearing a t-shirt in her profile picture, you can go with, “Hey, I have the same t-shirt you are wearing in your profile picture. Are you sure you didn’t steal mine?” Go with something silly which could make her smile, “Hey, your cat is so adorable! My cat is mesmerized and would like you to share her number?”
18. Take her profile’s help
Check the bio or description of her social media handles to get cues on how to start the conversation. If she has mentioned she is a book lover, you can start by saying, “Hey, I see that you are a bibliophile. Which is the last book that you found interesting? I loved “A Man Called Ove.”
Suppose she mentioned that she likes a particular show, you can text, “Hey, your profile says you love Friends; I love it too. Who is your favorite character?” If she is an avid traveler, you can write, “I am pleased to come across a fellow globetrotter. Where was your last trip?”
19. Drop the name of your mutual friend
If you find mutual friends on social media, you can use their names to kickstart a conversation. It will help establish a better connection as she would give you a better chance than a random guy with no common friends. You can say things such as, “Hey, I came across your profile and saw that we both know Matt. He is my college buddy. How do you know him?”
20. Use the posts she shared
Her posts can tell you many things about her personality. You can use them to break the ice and connect with her online. If she has shared cute dog videos, you can start the conversation by referring to the dog you own or expressing your love for dogs. For example, “Hey, the dog video you shared is adorable. It reminds me of my lovely lab, Leo. Which dog do you have?” If she shares a cake recipe, you can ping her online, “Hello, that cake recipe you shared looks delicious. I wish to give it a shot. Any tips before I start?”
21. Aks her permission
Asking for permission before starting a full-fledged conversation online shows that you are considerate and polite. She wouldn’t consider you a threat and might give you a chance. You can start by telling her why you thought about messaging her and then proceed to ask for her consent. For example, “Hi, I came across your profile and found it very interesting. We have similar interests. Do you mind if we chat for a while?” You can also go with, “You seem like a really cool person. Are you free to chat for some time?”
Approaching the girl you like becomes easy when you know the right techniques. You don’t need to have a gift of gab to pull them off. Some practice, self-assurance, and a bit of charm can help you have a smooth and exciting conversation with the girl you like. Keep in mind that a conversation is a two-way street, so understand her responses and tailor your conversation accordingly.
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