Do girls like introverts or extroverts?
Do you feel like the dating world is working against you because you're an introvert? Do you find yourself wondering, "Do girls like quiet guys?" Before you throw in the towel on dating and decide that you must be destined to remain single, keep reading. You may be surprised to hear that what you thought was an obstacle could be an advantage for dating.
Reasons Girls Are Attracted To The Quiet Guys
You may have thought that extroverts had all the luck, but that's not always the case. There are many reasons why girls are attracted to the quiet guys. If you happen to be a quiet guy, you could be in luck.
Here are some reasons why girls are attracted to people just like you:
You Come Across As Mysterious
While this might not be something to build an entire relationship on, it can be just the thing that you need to get the girl's attention. You can think of yourself a little like James Bond.
You have a quietness about you that makes people, including women, take an interest in you. They may not be able to read you right away, which can make them want to take the time to get to know you. Your quietness can help you to engage in conversation with women because they may be more willing to start the conversation.
You Have Interesting Things To Say
Quiet people tend to be listeners and observers. That means that when they do talk, they have more interesting and deeper things to say. This can be an attractive trait in a partner.
When someone talks nonstop or is constantly pointing out things that they think or notice, without really thinking about it, it can become a lot to handle. Especially early on in a relationship. However, the fact that you are quieter can play to your advantage for girls that are looking for more thoughtful guys.
You Show Self-Confidence
You may not feel like it, but you give off a level of self-confidence simply by being quiet. And while not everyone is attracted to confidence, such as those with low self-esteem, many are.
In an article titled, Introverts Have the Most Interesting Mind, it says, "A high self-confidence often characterizes quiet people. They do not let themselves be carried away by other people's opinions; they have solid values and clear ideas."
The simple fact that you remain quieter when others are actively engaged in debate and conversation gives the impression that you are confident in your own opinions and beliefs. You aren't trying to persuade everyone listening to adapt your opinion, and that can be attractive to women.
You Seem Like A Good Listener
On average, women like to talk more than men. And, just like anyone, they like to be listened to when they're talking. If you are quiet, it gives the appearance that you are a good listener. This can make a woman feel heard and understood by you, which can help a relationship to develop.
Tips For Introverted Men
You may be reading the reasons listed above about why girls might like you like a quiet guy and thinking, "Sure, that might work for some guys, but not me." If this is where you are, don't give up. Here are some tips that can help you along the way.
- Address Social Anxiety
If you are quiet around others because of social anxiety, then you probably aren't coming across as quiet, cool and confident. Instead, you might make women feel a little uncomfortable and awkward.
Signs that you have social anxiety include things like:
- Blushing
- Trembling
- Sweating
- Increased heart rate
- Fear that everyone is looking at you
- Believing that everyone is judging you
- Fear of embarrassing yourself in front of others
- Expecting the worst-case scenario when in social settings
This is not a complete list, but just a few of the possible symptoms that you may be experiencing. If you think that you are struggling with social anxiety, talk to a licensed therapist. They can help you work through your anxiety and identify strategies and coping skills that you can learn to overcome it.
Being introverted or naturally quiet is one thing. But struggling with social anxiety is different and something that should be addressed to help you live your best life.
- Focus On Getting To Know Her Instead Of Dating Her
The pressure of thinking that you have to act quickly and ask her out can be overwhelming. If you aren't comfortable coming on so straightforward, work on becoming friends with her and getting to know her better. This can help you build up a comfort level with her and see if she's interested in you as well.
- Don't Try To Be Something That You're Not
It doesn't matter how much you like the girl if you win her over by acting like an extrovert when it's not natural for you, then you're likely to run into problems down the road of your relationship. You want to find a girl that likes you for who you are. If you win her over by acting like an extrovert she's going to be surprised later when your behavior changes. She's going to feel like you tried the bait-and-switch.
Make sure that you are yourself when trying to meet girls. This is important for you to find the right girl and not just any girl.
- Go Where You Feel The Most Comfortable
There are girls all over the place. If you like going to the gym, you can meet girls at the gym. If you enjoy hiking, you can meet girls on the trail (if you pick the right one). If you enjoy coffee, you may meet the right person at the local coffee shop down the street. Stop thinking that you have to be in a certain scene to meet girls. You are going to be more comfortable and have a better chance of meeting girls that you have things in common with if you focus on meeting them at the places that you naturally go anyway.
- Learn To Read The Signs That She's Interested
As an introverted guy, it can be a challenge to approach a girl that you find attractive. The fear of rejection can be a lot to handle. That's why you need to learn how to spot the signs that a woman is interested in you.
When you're able to recognize these signs, it will help you to start approaching the women that will most likely respond more positively to your advances. Here are some things to look for:
- She smiles at you. The more, the better.
- You keep catching her eye, and she doesn't break away quickly from your eye contact.
- She stands or sits close to you
- She seems to be purposefully in an area that you often are
Knowing how to read the signs that she's interested in can help you avoid approaching the women that are not.
- Go After Someone In Your League
Some research has found that people tend to be attracted to those that are around the same level of attractiveness as themselves. That means you have a better chance of succeeding in getting the attention of a girl that's on the same level as you. That doesn't mean that you can't approach someone else that might be more attractive or less attractive than you, but it might not give you the best odds of having success.
- Ask Open-Ended Questions
As an introvert, you probably don't want the pressure of having to carry the conversation. That means you need to learn the art of asking great open-ended questions and being a good listener. An open-ended question is one that requires an answer more than just a one-word reply.
When you ask a woman these types of questions, you are going to get her talking and learn more about her. This will help you to find areas that you can connect with her. When you pair this with being a great listener, you will be able to pick up on what question you can ask to keep her talking.
- Don't Settle
Approaching women and dating may be hard for you. It may be something that you want to get through as soon as you can, but it's not something you should rush. Don't settle for a woman that's not a good fit for you simply because you already have her and don't want to go through the process again. And, don't appear desperate because that's a huge turnoff to women.
Work With A Therapist
If you are struggling to find a girl, talk to a therapist. They can help you learn to be more comfortable and confident in your skin. This is what you want to find a woman that's the right fit for you.
What Kind of Woman Goes After a Shy Guy?
Quiet guys attract both calm and chatty women. There is not necessarily one type of girl that is attracted to a quiet guy. If interests are similar and both on the same pages, oftentimes opposites do attract.
Is a Quiet Guy Attractive to Women?
Many times, the “quiet guy” is attractive to women. These men are seen as mysterious, and women find them to be a puzzle to solve. While quiet guys are not intentionally puzzling, women find this quality to be a positive attribute.
Do Men and Women Like Outgoing People to be More Attractive?
No one trait is suitable or attractive to all. Every man and woman tends to have a “type” that is appealing. Both outgoing and quiet guys are attracted to women, just like outgoing and modest women are attracted to men. Men and women like what they like, and they will keep looking until they find their one and only.
Not all women are attracted to one type of guy versus the other. Women find men who listen to them to be more attractive than men who ignore them.
How Are Power Hungry Men Perceived to Women?
When asked, women preferred a man who knew what he wanted but also attended to their needs. Powerful men, like President Donald Trump, Bill Clinton, and Barrack Obama, all have by their side women who carry their own sense of power and position in this world. These women preferred and were attracted to a man who knew what they wanted in life and went after it.
Where Donald Trump has been married several times, and Barrack Obama just once, each had the ability to attract a woman who complimented them mentally.
While comments on this article may support different points of view, at the end of the day, only the men and women in each relationship know what they find attractive about their partner.
