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Monday, 11 October 2021
How do I find my real purpose in life?
How To Find Your PASSION In Life | Find Your True Purpose ft. Tom Bilyeu
Purpose of life signifies life direction.
If you have a purpose, you save yourself as well as several others.
But if you are clueless in life you bring problems to yourself and people around you.
To have a blissful life, you must have a life purpose.
Here are some effective ways to find your purpose of life. It’s not complicated.
1. Identify the things you care about
Purpose is all about applying your skills toward contributing to the greater good in a way that matters to you. So, identifying what you care about is an important first step.
2. Reflect on what matters most
Sometimes it can be hard to single out one or two things that matter most to you because your circle of care and concern is far-ranging.
Understanding what you value most may help you narrow down your purpose in life to something manageable that also truly resonates with you.
How To Find And Pursue Your Passion | Think Out Loud With Jay Shetty
3.Try volunteering
Finding purpose involves more than just self-reflection.
It’s also about trying out new things and seeing how those activities enable you to use your skills to make a meaningful difference in the world.
Volunteering in a community organization focused on something of interest to you could provide you with some experience and do good at the same time.
Working with an organization serving others can put you in touch with people who share your passions and inspire you.
4. Recognize your strengths and talents
We all have strengths and skills that we’ve developed over our lifetimes, which help make up our unique personalities.
Yet some of us may be unsure of what we have to offer.
5.Look to the people you admire
Sometimes the people we admire most in life give us a clue to how we might want to contribute to a better world ourselves.
Reading about the work of civil rights leaders or climate activists can give us a moral uplift that can serve as motivation for working toward the greater good.
What do you think is the purpose of life for the following item?
The above item is called brick and it is made for building houses, where people shall live.
This brick would however be buried inside the cement and paint and no one would even notice its existence.
You can of course use this brick to throw at someone in order to injure him or even kill him.
In this way, it can be displayed in the courts, feared by people and known to every person.
But that is not the purpose of the brick.
Let’s take another example,
In the above picture, you see mangoes.
The purpose of the mango is to provide nourishment to all living beings.
The mango would lose its life in process, but it would provide nourishment to men.
You can of course take these beautiful mangoes and keep it in the drawing room and everyone can appreciate their beauty.
But that won’t fulfill the purpose of the life of the mango.
It is all the same for human beings.
The purpose of human life is to be useful.
Just like nature has created numerous things so that they can be used for the benefit of the rest, each human being is created to be useful to the world.
We all have been given different talents and abilities so that we can make the world better in our own unique way.
How To Find Your Purpose In Life | Marisa Peer
There has never been a person like us in the past, and there is never going to be a person like us in future.
It is our purpose of life to discover in which way we can contribute best to the world and then make all out effort to become useful to the world by giving whatever we have.
You must not live the life that is most enjoyable or glorious for you.
You must live a life that exploits your full potential and make the world better not only for the present generation, but also for the future generations.
Don't look externally for answers. External influence will only amplify your internal problems and ruin your chances, divert attention from your internal focus to the real external chaos in the world, and cause you to get lost in a world full of confusion and turmoil.
Pay attention to what your gut is telling you. Then look for external signs of things your gut is leading you to do. Many people lose it at this point, preferring to listen to all the external noise, only to regret later when they see someone else doing exactly what their gut was telling them.
Your real purpose is not just about going to school, getting a job, dating and finding a loving partner, spending time with your family, buying a big house, driving a Ferrari, going on holidays with your friends, getting kids, or traveling the world. These are just byproducts of your real purpose.
There’s a strong connection between your ultimate happiness and your purpose. By this I don’t mean getting high on drugs. Getting high on drugs will bring you to grief instead of taking you to real happiness. Ultimate happiness is the fulfillment of life, which has something to do with creating impact for the greater good.
Do you like to find a quiet place devoid of all human beings, where you can meditate and just connect with your soul? Quiet places where there’s no telephone or internet, or any form of noise whatsoever, apart from the singing of birds, can be fertile ground for breeding creative thoughts.
We all know we should have goals, but how big should they be? | Marisa Peer
Do you take care of your physical as well as your spiritual body? If not, then you’re missing out on the foundations of a great, healthy lifestyle, while denying yourself longevity. Physical activity, exercise, and nourishment, are essential components of a happy, fulfilled and purposeful life.
Do you find yourself restless, hyperactive, and irritated by patience most of the time? Then perhaps you should become a musician, dancer, acrobat, or athlete. On the other hand, you could also do well as a journalist, especially if you were a noisemaker in school.
Do you often find yourself at times taking shortcuts, irritated by patience, being lazy, hating speed, and generally, just procrastinating? Then you should perhaps pray that you don’t become a robber or a thief.
Are you irritated by goal setting, and don’t understand why people should plan for their lives? After all, what can happen will happen—right? Lack of goal setting and planning are the recipe for failure and a miserable life. If you don’t set your own goals, others will set them for you. And that will be for the fulfillment of their purposes—not yours.
Are you an extrovert, outgoing, and generally, not afraid of meeting people and making new friends? Then perhaps you should become a politician or businessperson, or find an outgoing career like becoming a snake oil salesman or a door-to-door pizza delivery salesperson.
Are you an introvert, reserved, and generally hate talking to strangers? Then perhaps you should chase a career as an engineer, neurosurgeon, or one of the creative fine arts or sciences.
Are you an adventurous, risk-taking daredevil, who doesn’t scare easily, and is not afraid to try out new things whether they fail or not? Then you should not try getting a 9–5 job, for you will not last long. I’ll tell you what you should try—entrepreneurship.
How does your heart feel when you see human suffering? Then perhaps you shouldn't become a photojournalist.
If you're easily irritated by noise, then you shouldn't become a doctor, surgeon, or a high court judge. On the other hand if you’re easily irritated by all the injustices in the world, then perhaps you should chase a career in law.
If you're interested in money, then perhaps you shouldn't become a priest or a monk. On the other hand if you’re easily irritated by all the corruption in the world, in governments, in the corporate world, and in business, then you should perhaps chase a career in accountancy, audit, or forensic investigation.
If you've completely failed to find out what you're good at, then perhaps you should ask people. Your family and close friends can be your first stop, but you can also look far and wide. Their eyes can reach where you cannot see. Sometimes, we need to stand on the shoulders of others to see far.
Your life's purpose is inside your DNA, which means you were designed for a specific purpose. Your only job is to map out your DNA to that external purpose you think you were born for. Find that purpose by keenly listening to your feelings and emotions.
Finding your purpose is like finding your true love. You just know it. You’ll know with every fiber of your being when you’ve found your real purpose. Even when times get tough, you’ll still feel as drawn to your purpose as though you were a dog which has found a bone.
How To Find Your Purpose - 9 Types (Which one is for you?)
The combination of a successful career, a loving family, and a strong social network may seem like the recipe for a perfect life. However, even those who can check each of those boxes might feel like something is missing—and that “something” is their purpose in life.
“Finding your purpose” is more than just a cliché or a dream that will never be fulfilled. It’s actually a tool for better, happier, healthier life that too few people attempt to use.
Only around 25% of Americans adults cite having a clear sense of purpose about what makes their lives meaningful, according to one analysis of the subject in The New York Times,1 while 40% either claim neutrality on the subject, or say they don't.
Why Do You Need a Sense of Purpose?
A 2010 study published in Applied Psychology2 found that individuals with high levels of eudemonic well-being—which involves having a sense of purpose along with a sense of control and a feeling like what you do is worthwhile—tend to live longer. Other researchers3 found that well-being might be protective for health maintenance. In that research, people with the strongest well-being were 30 percent less likely to die during the eight-and-a-half-year follow-up period.
There’s also research that links feeling as if you have a sense of purpose to positive health outcomes,4 such as fewer strokes and heart attacks, better sleep, and a lower risk of dementia and disabilities.
A 2016 study published in the Journal of Research and Personality found that individuals who feel a sense of purpose make more money than individuals who feel as though their work lacks meaning.
So the good news is, you don’t have to choose between having wealth and living a meaningful life. You might find the more purpose you have, the more money you’ll earn.
Jordan Peterson - What To Do If I Don't Have Any Goals?
With all of those benefits, it’s clear that it’s important to find purpose and meaning in your life. But purpose and meaning is not something that can be determined quickly.
Press Play for Advice On Self-Advocacy
Hosted by Editor-in-Chief and therapist Amy Morin, LCSW, this episode of The Verywell Mind Podcast, featuring activist Erin Brockovich, shares tips on standing up for what’s right, taking care of yourself, and tackling things that seem impossible. Click below to listen now.
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The process requires plenty of self-reflection, listening to others, and finding where your passions lie.5 These seven strategies can help you reveal or find your purpose so you can begin living a more meaningful life.
1
Donate Time, Money, or Talent
Finding your purpose in life has many benefits.
Hero Images / Getty Images
If there’s just one habit you can create to help you find your purpose, it would be helping others.
Researchers at Florida State University and Stanford found that happiness and meaningfulness had overlap but were different: Happiness was linked to being a taker before a giver, whereas meaningfulness went more with being a giver than a taker. Being the “giver” in a relationship connected people with having a more purposeful life.
Altruistic behaviors could include volunteering6 for a nonprofit organization, donating money to causes you care about, or simply helping out the people around you on a day-to-day basis.
Whether you decide to spend two Saturdays a month serving meals in a soup kitchen, or you volunteer to drive your elderly neighbor to the grocery store once a week, doing something kind for others can make you feel as though your life has meaning.
Why We Risk Our Own Well-Being to Help Others
WHAT IS YOUR PURPOSE IN LIFE | Steve Harvey Motivational Video
2
Listen to Feedback
It can be hard to recognize the things you feel passionate about sometimes. After all, you probably like to do many different things and the things you love to do may have become so ingrained in your life that you don’t realize how important those things are.
Fortunately, other people might be able to give you some insight. There’s a good chance you’re already displaying your passion and purpose to those around you without even realizing it.
You might choose to reach out to people and ask what reminds them of you or what they think of when you enter their mind. Or you might take note when someone pays you a compliment or makes an observation about you. Write those observations down and look for patterns.
Whether people think of you as “a great entertainer” or they say “you have a passion for helping the elderly,” hearing others say what they notice about you might reinforce some of the passions you’ve already been engaging in.
3
Surround Yourself With Positive People
As the saying goes, you are the company you keep. What do you have in common with the people who you choose to be around?
Don’t think about co-workers or family members you feel obligated to see. Think about the people you choose to spend time with outside of work and outside of family functions.
The people you surround yourself with say something about you. If you’re surrounded by people who are making positive change, you might draw from their inspiration.
On the other hand, if the people around you are negative individuals who drag you down, you might want to make some changes. It’s hard to feel passionate and purposeful when you’re surrounded by people who aren’t interested in making positive contributions.
How to End a Stressful Relationship Successfully
Finding Your Purpose | Steven Furtick
4
Start Conversations With New People
It’s easy to browse social media while you’re alone on the subway or sitting at a bar waiting for a friend. Resist that urge. Instead, take the time to talk to the people around you.
Ask them if they are working on any projects or what they like to do for fun. Talk to them about organizations with which they are involved or if they like to donate to any particular cause.
Even though striking up conversations with strangers may feel awkward at first, talking to people outside of your immediate social circle can open your eyes to activities, causes or career opportunities that you never even knew existed.
You might discover new activities to explore or different places to visit. And those activities might be key to helping you find your purpose.
Starting a Conversation When You Are Socially Anxious
5
Explore Your Interests
Is there a topic that you are regularly talking about in a Facebook status update or in a Tweet? Are you regularly sharing articles about climate change or refugees?
Are there pictures on Instagram of you engaging in a particular activity over and over, such as gardening or performing?
Understanding The Purpose For Your Life | Dr. Myles Munroe
Consider the conversations you enjoy holding with people the most when you’re meeting face-to-face. Do you like talking about history? Or do you prefer sharing the latest money-saving tips you discovered?
The things you like to talk about and the things you enjoy sharing on social media may reveal the things that give you purpose in life.
6
Consider Injustices That Bother You
Many people have their pet causes or passion projects that surround an injustice in the world. Is there anything that makes you so deeply unhappy to think about that it bothers you to the core?
It might be animal welfare, a particular civil rights issue or childhood obesity organizations. Perhaps the idea of senior citizens spending the holidays alone makes you weepy or you think that substance abusers need more rehabilitation opportunities—the organizations are out there, and they need your help.
You don’t necessarily have to engage in your purpose full-time. You might find your career gives you the ability to afford to help a cause you feel passionate about. Or, you might find that you are able to donate time—as opposed to money—to give to a cause that you believe in.
7
Discover What You Love to Do
On the other end of the spectrum, simply thinking about what you truly love to do can help you find your purpose as well.
Do you absolutely love musical theater? Your skills might be best put to use in a way that brings live performances to children who can benefit from exposure to the arts.
Is analyzing data something that you actually find fun? Any number of groups could find that skill to be an invaluable asset.
Consider what type of skills, talents, and passions you bring to the table. Then, brainstorm how you might turn your passion into something meaningful to you.
Dr Myles Munroe - How To Discover God's Purpose For Your Life
The Importance of Hobbies for Stress Relief
A Word From Verywell
Finding your purpose isn’t something that can be done in a few days, weeks or months. It can be a lifelong journey, and it can only be done one step at a time.
You also might find that your purpose changes over time. Perhaps you liked working with animals in your youth but now you want to join forces with a cause that fights human trafficking. You can definitely have more than one purpose, too.
Keep in mind your purpose doesn’t necessarily mean you have to change what you’re doing already. If you give haircuts to people, you might decide your purpose in life is to help others feel beautiful.
If you work as a school custodian, you might find your purpose is creating an environment that helps children learn.
Occasionally, you might want to pause what you’re doing and reflect on whether you feel like the path you are on is taking you in the direction you want to go. If it’s not, then you can change course. Sometimes that road to finding your purpose has a few curves, forks, and stop lights.
ne day, when my brother was 18, he waltzed into the living room and proudly announced to my mother and me that one day he was going to be a senator. My mom probably gave him the “That’s nice, dear,” treatment while I’m sure I was distracted by a bowl of Cheerios or something.
But for fifteen years, this purpose informed all of my brother’s life decisions: what he studied in school, where he chose to live, who he connected with, and even what he did with many of his vacations and weekends.
After almost half a lifetime of work later, he’s the chairman of a major political party and a judge. He also ran for state congress in his 30s and barely lost.
Don’t get me wrong. My brother is a freak. This basically never happens.
T.D. Jakes: Discovering Your God-Designed Destiny
Most of us have no clue what we want to do with our lives. Even after we finish school. Even after we get a job. Even after we’re making money. Between ages 18 and 25, I changed career aspirations more often than I changed my underwear. And even after I had a business, it took another four years to clearly define what I wanted for my life.
Chances are you’re more like me and have no clue what you want to do. It’s a struggle almost every adult goes through. “What do I want to do with my life?” “What am I passionate about?” “What do I not suck at?” I often receive emails from people in their 40s and 50s who still have no clue what they want to do with themselves.
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The Problem With Looking for a “Life Purpose”
Part of the problem is the concept of “life purpose” itself. The idea that we were each born for some higher purpose and it’s now our cosmic mission to find it. This is the same kind of shitty logic used to justify things like spirit crystals or that your lucky number is 34 (but only on Tuesdays or during full moons).
Here’s the truth. We exist on this earth for some undetermined period of time. During that time we do things. Some of these things are important. Some of them are unimportant. And those important things give our lives meaning and happiness. The unimportant ones basically just kill time.
So when people say, “What should I do with my life?” or “What is my life purpose?” what they’re actually asking is:
“What can I do with my time that is important?”
Finding My Purpose - John Maxwell
This is an infinitely better question to ask. It’s far more manageable and it doesn’t have all of the ridiculous baggage that the “life purpose” question does. There’s no reason for you to be contemplating the cosmic significance of your life while sitting on your couch all day eating Doritos. Rather, you should be getting off your ass and discovering what feels important to you.
One of the most common email questions I get is people asking me what they should do with their lives, what their “life purpose” is. This is an impossible question for me to answer. After all, for all I know, this person is really into knitting sweaters for kittens or filming gay bondage porn in their basement. I have no clue. Who am I to say what’s right or what’s important to them?
But after some research, I have put together a series of questions to help you figure out for yourself what is important to you and what can add more meaning to your life.
These questions are by no means exhaustive or definitive. In fact, they’re a little bit ridiculous. But I made them that way because discovering purpose in our lives should be something that’s fun and interesting, not a chore.
So whether you’re looking for your dream job, thinking about starting a second career, or you just don’t want to spend your entire life wondering “what if…”, hopefully you find some meaningful answers to these ridiculous—but kind of thought-provoking—questions.
What’s Your Favorite Flavor of Shit Sandwich and Does It Come With an Olive?
What shit sandwich do you want to eat? Because eventually, we all get served one.
—Mark Manson
Ah, yes. The all-important question. What flavor of shit sandwich would you like to eat? Because here’s the sticky little truth about life that they don’t tell you at high school pep rallies:
Everything sucks, some of the time.
Now, that probably sounds incredibly pessimistic. And you may be thinking, “Hey Mr. Manson, turn that frown upside down.” But I actually think this is a liberating idea.
Why I stopped searching for my life purpose.
Everything involves sacrifice. Everything includes some sort of cost. Nothing is pleasurable or uplifting all of the time. So, the question becomes: what struggle or sacrifice are you willing to tolerate? Ultimately, what determines our ability to stick with something we care about is our ability to handle the rough patches and ride out the inevitable rotten days.
If you want to be a brilliant tech entrepreneur, but you can’t handle failure, then you’re not going to make it far. If you want to be a professional artist, but you aren’t willing to see your work rejected hundreds, if not thousands of times, then you’re done before you start. If you want to be a hotshot court lawyer, but can’t stand the 80-hour workweeks, then I’ve got bad news for you.
Finding your life purpose involves eating a shit sandwich or twoWhat unpleasant experiences are you able to handle? Are you able to stay up all night coding? Are you able to put off starting a family for 10 years? Are you able to have people laugh you off the stage over and over again until you get it right?
What shit sandwich do you want to eat? Because we all get served one eventually.
And your favorite shit sandwich is your competitive advantage. By definition, anything that you’re willing to do (that you enjoy doing) that most people are not willing to do gives you a huge leg-up.
So, find your favorite shit sandwich. And you might as well pick one with an olive.
The Answer to This Question Will Tell You:
What struggles you are willing to tolerate to get what you want
What you will likely be better than other people at
What’s True About You Today That Would Make Your 8-Year-Old Self Cry?
Something about the social pressures of adolescence and professional pressures of young adulthood squeezes the passion out of us. We’re taught that the only reason to do something is if we’re somehow rewarded for it. And the transactional nature of the world inevitably stifles us and makes us feel lost or stuck.
—Mark Manson
When I was a child, I used to write stories. I used to sit in my room for hours by myself, writing away, about aliens, about superheroes, about great warriors, about my friends and family. Not because I wanted anyone to read it. Not because I wanted to impress my parents or teachers. But for the sheer joy of it.
How to figure out what to do with your life.
And then, for some reason, I stopped. And I don’t remember why.
We all have a tendency to lose touch with what we loved as a child. Something about the social pressures of adolescence and professional pressures of young adulthood squeezes the passion out of us. We’re taught that the only reason to do something is if we’re somehow rewarded for it. And the transactional nature of the world inevitably stifles us and makes us feel lost or stuck.
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It wasn’t until I was in my mid-20s that I rediscovered how much I loved writing. And it wasn’t until I started my business that I remembered how much I enjoyed building websites—something I did in my early teens, just for fun.
The funny thing though, is that if my 8-year-old self asked my 20-year-old self, “Why don’t you write anymore?” and I replied, “Because I’m not good at it,” or “Because nobody would read what I write,” or “Because you can’t make money doing that,” not only would I have been completely wrong, but that eight-year-old-boy version of me would have probably started crying. That eight-year-old boy didn’t care about Google traffic or social media virality or book advances. He just wanted to play. And that’s where passion always begins: with a sense of play.
The Answer to This Question Will Tell You:
What childhood passion you lost to adulthood
What activity you should revisit, just for the fun of it
What Makes You Forget to Eat and Poop?
Look at the activities that keep you up all night, but look at the cognitive principles behind those activities that enthrall you. Because they can easily be applied elsewhere.
—Mark Manson
We’ve all had that experience where we get so wrapped up in something that minutes turn into hours and hours turn into “Holy crap, I forgot to have dinner.”
How to Create the Life You Want (And Find Your North Star)
Supposedly, in his prime, Isaac Newton’s mother had to regularly come in and remind him to eat because he would spend entire days so absorbed in his work that he would forget.
I used to be like that with video games. This probably wasn’t a good thing. In fact, for many years it was kind of a problem. I would sit and play video games instead of doing more important things like studying for an exam, or showering regularly, or speaking to other humans face-to-face.
It wasn’t until I gave up the games that I realized my passion wasn’t for the games themselves (although I do love them). My passion is for improvement, being good at something and then trying to get better. The games themselves—the graphics, the stories—they were cool, but I can easily live without them. It’s the competition with others and with myself that I thrive on.
And when I applied that obsessiveness for self-improvement and competition to my own business and to my writing, well, things took off in a big way.
Maybe for you, it’s something else. Maybe it’s organizing things efficiently, or getting lost in a fantasy world, or teaching somebody something, or solving technical problems. Whatever it is, don’t just look at the activities that keep you up all night, but look at the cognitive principles behind those activities that enthrall you. Because they can easily be applied elsewhere.
The Answer to This Question Will Tell You:
What you truly enjoy doing
What other activities to check out that you might also enjoy
How Can You Better Embarrass Yourself?
Embrace embarrassment. Feeling foolish is part of the path to achieving something important, something meaningful. The more a major life decision scares you, chances are the more you need to be doing it.
—Mark Manson
Before you are able to be good at something and do something important, you must first suck at something and have no clue what you’re doing. That’s pretty obvious. And in order to suck at something and have no clue what you’re doing, you must embarrass yourself in some shape or form, often repeatedly. And most people try to avoid embarrassing themselves, namely because it sucks.
3 Simple Ideas That Are Changing My Life
Ergo, due to the transitive property of awesomeness, if you avoid anything that could potentially embarrass you, then you will never end up doing something that feels important.
Yes, it seems that once again, it all comes back to vulnerability.
Right now, there’s something you want to do, something you think about doing, something you fantasize about doing, yet you don’t do it. You have your reasons, no doubt. And you repeat these reasons to yourself ad infinitum.
But what are those reasons? Because I can tell you right now that if those reasons are based on what others would think, then you’re screwing yourself over big time.
If your reasons are something like, “I can’t start a business because spending time with my kids is more important to me,” or “Playing Starcraft all day would probably interfere with my music, and music is more important to me,” then OK. Sounds good.
But if your reasons are, “My parents would hate it,” or “My friends would make fun of me,” or “If I failed, I’d look like an idiot,” then chances are, you’re actually avoiding something you truly care about because caring about that thing is what scares the shit out of you, not what mom thinks or what Timmy next door says.
Great things are, by their very nature, unique and unconventional. Therefore, to achieve them, we must go against the herd mentality. And to do that is scary.
Embrace embarrassment. Feeling foolish is part of the path to achieving something important, something meaningful. The more a major life decision scares you, chances are the more you need to be doing it.
The Answer to This Question Will Tell You:
What scares the shit out of you… for good reason
That you should stop making lousy excuses and start doing something
How Are You Going to Save the World?
You’re not going to fix the world’s problems by yourself. But you can contribute and make a difference. And that feeling of making a difference is ultimately what’s most important for your own happiness and fulfillment.
How to figure out what to do with your life
—Mark Manson
In case you haven’t seen the news lately, the world has a few problems. And by “a few problems,” what I really mean is, “everything is fucked and we’re all going to die.”
I’ve harped on this before, and the research also bears it out, but to live a happy and healthy life, we must hold on to values that are greater than our own pleasure or satisfaction.1
So pick a problem and start saving the world. There are plenty to choose from. Our screwed up education systems, economic development, domestic violence, mental health care, governmental corruption. Hell, I just saw an article this morning on sex trafficking in the US and it got me all riled up and wishing I could do something. It also ruined my breakfast.
Find a problem you care about and start solving it. Obviously, you’re not going to fix the world’s problems by yourself. But you can contribute and make a difference. And that feeling of making a difference is ultimately what’s most important for your own happiness and fulfillment. And importance equals purpose.
Now, I know what you’re thinking. “Gee Mark, I read all of this horrible stuff and I get all pissed off too, but that doesn’t translate to action, much less a new career path.”
Glad you asked…
The Answer to This Question Will Tell You:
What problem you care about that’s larger than you
How you can make a difference
Gun to Your Head, If You Had to Leave the House All Day, Every Day, Where Would You Go and What Would You Do?
Discovering what you’re passionate about in life and what matters to you is a full-contact sport, a trial-by-fire process. None of us know exactly how we feel about an activity until we actually do the activity.
What should I do with my life? | Charlie Parker | TEDxHeriotWattUniversity
—Mark Manson
For many of us, the enemy is just old-fashioned complacency. We get into our routines. We distract ourselves. The couch is comfortable. The Doritos are cheesy. And nothing new happens.
This is a problem.
What most people don’t understand is that passion is the result of action, not the cause of it.2, 3
Discovering what you’re passionate about in life and what matters to you is a full-contact sport, a trial-by-fire process. None of us know exactly how we feel about an activity until we actually do the activity.
So ask yourself, if someone put a gun to your head and forced you to leave your house every day for everything except for sleep, how would you choose to occupy yourself? And no, you can’t just go sit in a coffee shop and browse Facebook. You probably already do that. Let’s pretend there are no useless websites, no video games, no TV. Take yourself back to the 90’s when Facebook, Instagram, all this social media clusterfuck most of us spend half our lives on had yet to be invented. You have to be outside of the house all day every day actively doing something until it’s time to go to bed—where would you go and what would you do?
Sign up for a dance class? Join a book club? Go get another degree? Invent a new form of irrigation system that can save the thousands of children’s lives in rural Africa? Learn to hang glide?
What would you do with all of that time? What activity would you choose above all others? We all have only 24 hours in a day, and so we’re back to the all-important question that we all should be asking ourselves:
“What can I do with my time that is important?”
If it strikes your fancy, write down a few answers and then, you know, go out and actually do them. Bonus points if it involves embarrassing yourself.
How to Find Your Passion and Make it Your Job | Emma Rosen | TEDxYouth@Manchester
The Answer to This Question Will Tell You:
What you were passionate about all along
How you should spend your time
If You Knew You Were Going to Die One Year From Today, What Would You Do and How Would You Want to Be Remembered?
Ultimately, death is the only thing that gives us perspective on the value of our lives. Because it’s only by imagining your non-existence that you can get a sense of what is most important about your existence.
—Mark Manson
Most of us don’t like thinking about death. It freaks us out. But thinking about our own death surprisingly has a lot of practical advantages. One of those advantages is that it forces us to zero in on what’s actually important in our lives and what’s just frivolous and distracting.
When I was in college, I used to walk around and ask people, “If you had a year to live, what would you do?” As you can imagine, I was a huge hit at parties. A lot of people gave vague and boring answers. A few drinks were nearly spat on me. But it did cause people to really think about their lives in a different way and re-evaluate what their priorities were.
Ultimately, death is the only thing that gives us perspective on the value of our lives. Because it’s only by imagining your non-existence that you can get a sense of what is most important about your existence. What is your legacy going to be? What are the stories people are going to tell when you’re gone? What is your obituary going to say? Is there anything to say at all? If not, what would you like it to say? How can you start working towards that today?
And again, if you fantasize about your obituary saying a bunch of badass shit that impresses a bunch of random other people, then again, you’re failing here.
When people feel like they have no sense of direction, no purpose in their life, it’s because they don’t know what’s important to them, they don’t know what their values are.
And when you don’t know what your values are, then you’re essentially taking on other people’s values and living other people’s priorities instead of your own. This is a one-way ticket to unhealthy relationships and eventual misery.
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Discovering one’s “purpose” in life essentially boils down to finding those one or two things that are bigger than yourself, and bigger than those around you, values that will determine your priorities and guide your actions. It’s not about some great achievement, but merely finding a way to spend your limited amount of time well. And to do that you must get off your couch and act, and take the time to think beyond yourself, to think greater than yourself, and paradoxically, to imagine a world without yourself.
The Answer to This Question Will Tell You:
What is most important to you
What values should guide your actions
How to Know Who You Really Are
We all think we know ourselves well, but psychological studies show otherwise. In fact, most of us are somewhat deluded about ourselves. I put together a 22-page ebook explaining how we can come to know ourselves better, just fill out your email in the form.
You don’t…
Your “Purpose” doesn’t exist, at least not in the sense that you’re referring to.
If you want to “find” a purpose outside of yourself then I’ve got some good (or bad) new for you depending on how you look at it…
You’re already achieving your purpose!
Your “purpose” as a human being is simply to survive and do the best you can to pass on your genetic code through either procreation, contribution, or basically just not destroying an entire slice of the human race.
It’s that simple.
Unfortunately, I’m going to assume that this “Purpose” isn’t sufficient for you and you want more out of life.
What you’re craving is a more esoteric version of purpose.
You’re craving “Personal Purpose”.
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Luckily, despite what some gurus would have you believe, you don’t need to attend a 10 day retreat in the jungles of Peru and trip your balls off on ayahuasca to find your purpose.
You don’t need to go on a “Vision Quest” or attend some seminar or go through some insanely convoluted journalling process to find your purpose.
In fact…
You can determine your purpose by the end of this response.
And now I’ll show you how.
***Important Note: You said “Time is running out”…. How in the hell did you come to that conclusion? I’m going to assume that you’re probably in your 20’s or 30’s if you’re here on Quora.
Even if you’re in your 40’s 50’s or 60’s, you still have another 3–4 DECADES of life to live! Some of the most famous people in the world didn’t “find” their purpose until they were well into the second half of their life.
So before we get into things, I need you to drop this notion that time is running out RIGHT NOW. If you’re under 40, you’re still a kid (myself included), so chill out and realize that you have plenty of time. This kind of stress will kill you and stop you from finding your purpose. So relax, m’kay?***
1. You Don’t “Find” a Purpose, You Create It
Before we can start out this conversation, it’s important to realize something…
You CANNOT find your purpose.
It’s impossible.
Would you like to know why?
Because, according to all of our best research and our understanding of the natural world, LIFE does not serve a specific function other than to exist.
There is no fundamental reason for the existence of life except for existence itself.
Trees don’t have a purpose, the bees you see in your yard don’t have a purpose, your dog doesn’t have a purpose.
Sure, within the confines of nature, they serve a specific function: Trees produce oxygen and absorb carbon dioxide, bees pollinate plants and produce honey, and your dog gives you unconditional love and awkwardly stares at you while your attempting to get it on.
But there’s no grand reason why trees, bees, your dog, or even you exist.
You don’t serve some sort of divine purpose that will make or break the fabric of the universe.
Our existence, whether we want to admit it or not, is largely inconsequential.
This could be seen as depressing, nihilistic even…
But I’d argue that it’s not.
Because here’s the thing.
The fact that we lack inherent purpose gives us the freedom to create our own purpose.
Simon Sinek - FIND YOUR TRUE PURPOSE (Powerful Motivational Speech)
We are the only known beings in the universe who have this ability.
We get to DECIDE what our purpose is and MAKE a purpose for ourselves.
No one can tell us that it’s wrong or incorrect (from an objective standpoint) because there is no objective purpose to life outside of the experience of living.
Once you accept this… Everything changes.
You’ll no longer view your purpose as something that you’re burdened to find.
But instead, you get to ask yourself, “What do I want my purpose to be? What would ensure that I’m fulfilled when I finally die?”
And that’s where true power is unlocked.
2. Ask Yourself the Big Three Questions
Now that you’ve (hopefully) accepted that you don’t HAVE a purpose but instead have the ability to create a purpose for your life, it’s time to ask yourself three simple but insanely powerful questions.
Who do I want to be
What do I want to contribute
How do I want to do it
I’m sure you’ve gone through this before, but I want you to slow down and really think through this.
Don’t ask yourself, “How much money do I want to make”, “What business do I want to run”, or “What kind of car do I want to drive”.
Those things don’t matter.
Instead, ask yourself the questions I just shared with you.
WHO do you want to be? When people describe you, what do you want them to say? What sort of virtues and character traits do you want to embody? What is the essence of WHO you want to become in this lifetime?
WHAT do you want to contribute? I’m not referring to financial contributions (although this could be a part of it), I mean the bigger picture. What sort of impact do you want to have with your life? What pisses you off or makes you happy?
What sort of problems do you see in your everyday life that you want to solve? This is a powerful clue as to what sort of purpose you should create for yourself.
HOW do you want to do it? Once you’ve identified the impact and contribution you want to make, all that’s left for you to determine is how you want to do it.
You could become an entrepreneur, raise money through charities, follow a career path that will allow you to have a specific impact, or just BE a certain type of person.
I know these questions sound simple, but when you really take the time to sit with them and ponder them, you’ll realize that these three questions are THE key to determining what you want your purpose in life to be.
But if you go through this (it should take no less than 2 hours of deep thought to answer the above questions… Ideally after a long hike or walk on the beach), and STILL can’t come up with your purpose, I’ll do you a favor and GIVE you your new purpose.
3. If All Else Fails… THIS Is Your Purpose
If you can’t create a purpose for yourself right now, then your purpose is simple.
TO FIND YOUR PURPOSE BY EXPERIENCING AS MUCH OF LIFE AS POSSIBLE.
That’s it.
FIND YOUR WHY | SIMON SINEK MOTIVATION
You won’t find your purpose by doing the same things you’ve always done. It’s impossible.
Because you are limiting the range of your experience and cutting yourself off from things that might guide you.
So if you can’t find your purpose, your purpose is to experience as much of life as you can until you uncover a career path, opportunity, or business that resonates with you at your core.
Go and travel, volunteer with local charities, read books on new topics, attend classes on everything you can find (dance, martial arts, painting, archery, I don’t give a damn).
The more of life you experience, the more information and data you will have to help you figure out what sort of purpose is right for your life.
So if you haven’t made a purpose yet.
Get out there and live. THAT is your new purpose.
To be a bold adventurer, courageously trying new things until you find THE thing you want to devote your life to.
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